8/05/2019

Perfect Is The Enemy Of. . . .

Good, or so the quote goes.

But it's also the enemy of happiness, gratitude, progress, productivity and change.

As anyone who has ever met me or read this blog can tell you, I'm not a perfectionist. I don't believe in perfect . . . but I have a problem with perfecting. I have an unflinching belief that I can solve all problems just by trying harder and finding the perfect system.

I almost ordered this bag a few months ago. Not because I needed a new bag, but because I just thought if I found the perfect way to organize all my crap for literacy coaching job, I would solve the problem of hating the job.

(Ok, I also love bags. And that one is cute, right?)

Spoiler alert: I re-organized everything, found a great system. . .and still hated the job.

This is probably a lesson I should have remembered from my first husband; I turned myself into Suzy homemaker (while subbing every day and tutoring most nights) and he was still a raging, narcissistic asshole. You cannot perfect your way out of something inherently dysfunctional.

And it's probably inherently dysfunctional of me to think I have to perfect everything; some of which isn't even an actual problem. And that's what I mean about perfection being the enemy of happiness and progress. It's harder to enjoy your kids when you're worried about perfecting them; it's harder to enjoy a walk when you're obsessing over being in the optimal beats per minutes range.

And yet, by walking, you're doing a good thing for your body - whether it's in the optimal beats per minute range or not. So why can't we (me) celebrate that? Why can't I celebrate how awesome my kids are, instead of worrying that they're not at academic enrichment camps this summer?

I mean, I could celebrate these things. I could. If I just had a system for how to let go of perfecting things. . . .








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