Crafts for Lazy Parents: Make a Caddy

If you're one of those people who enjoys doing multi-step crafts with your children, where you have to do things like use x-acto knives and craft paper, bless your heart. Maybe you're a frustrated artist. Maybe you like doing everything for your children. Maybe you don't like crafts that look like they were made by actual children. Maybe you drink a lot of wine at nap time.

You may have guessed that I am not one of those people.

I'm not much of a free-range parent, except when it comes to crafting. Then I believe the less parental influence, the better. I see my job as providing material and encouragement, not using a hot glue gun or cutting out 100 shapes or tracing patterns or what have you. This is not solely because I am lazy, but because I believe it's pretty easy to squelch creativity. And I would like my kids to be creative. Which, I've been told by many of their teachers, they are.

Behold, the secret to raising creative kids:

The caddy. 

My kids have access to markers, crayons, pencils, glue and paper at all times. Admittedly, this has worked better since Hugmonkey grew out of the draw on the walls phase, but hopefully you're better at supervising your young children than I was. The easy access makes craft time something than can do anytime, not just when I feel like it. Plus, this way they can mix media and clean up after themselves much easier. 

I actually stole the whole concept from my classroom teaching days, where each table grouping shared pencils, glue sticks and crayons (most of my students couldn't afford to bring in supplies of their own). I had tried tubs and pencil boxes with my own kids, but nothing seemed to work the way I wanted it to. Until I remembered the caddies. Luckily, we had decorated some at Ironflower's 4th birthday party and I'd held onto to them. 

So honestly, instead of searching for the perfect craft and spending hours prepping for it, just put a caddy together and let your kids decorate it with stickers. Then hand over the paper and watch the creativity flow. The results might not be pin-worthy, but your kids will learn a lot more. 

We got our caddies from a birthday party, but I'm thinking of ordering these from Amazon so I can have more: 

Teaching Tuesday: Read To Your Kid Every Day

You already know you're supposed to read to your kid every day. Reading aloud may be the most important element in future reading success.  And if you don't believe me, here's a college student's explanations, complete with a bibliography of studies. You can look here too. Or you can trust my years teaching in a tough neighborhood; the kids who had someone read to them regularly did better in school, regardless of the other issues in their lives.

It's ideal to start from infancy. But even if your kid is two or six or twelve, reading aloud is still important. And helpful. Turn it into something non-negotiable, like bathing or sitting in a car seat. Here are my (mental) replies to excuses I've heard over the years.

Excuse: We don't have time every night!

Reply:  Then don't try to read an entire book every night. Try a Shel Silverstein poem or two. Do a page a night. Then find another time when you can read a bit more together. If you've got an older kid, make him or her read to the younger one while you make breakfast or dinner.

Excuse: My kid won't sit still while I read!

I was reading when this photo of Lovebug was taken.

Reply: Lovebug probably didn't sit still for an entire book until he was 3 years old. But I kept reading to him anyway, I'd make him sit on my lap for a few minutes and then I'd keep reading while he moved around his room. Now he loves to listen to books as well as to read them himself. Some kids aren't ready - some may never be ready - to sit still. That's okay. They can still hear you. They'll look at the pictures when they're very interested. Keep trying.

Excuse: My kid just doesn't like it when I read to him/her!

Reply: What are you reading? Are you letting your kid pick the book? Try that, even if it means you read the same book with no educational value over and over and over. Also, do you enjoy reading to your kid? Are you enthusiastic? Or can your kid tell you'd really rather be watching The Walking Dead?

Excuse: I don't have money to buy children's books!

Reply: Garage sales and library sales have books for like twenty-five cents a book. If even that's too much, join your local library. Libraries are still free. Ask people with older kids if they have books they could give or lend to your little one. Do people ever buy your child gifts? Ask them to buy books. Do you ever buy your child gifts? Buy some books instead of a toy that will entertain him for 5 minutes.

Excuse: I want my kid to learn English, but I don't read it very well.

Reply: If you read better in Spanish or Russian or Urdu, read in that language. There are still lots of benefits and your kid has a great shot at being totally bilingual. If you don't read well in any language, choose picture books with simple text, or practice reading the book ahead of time. If you've got a kiddo under the age of six, chances are s/he'll want you to read the same book over and over anyway. Here are some books that are engaging, as well as pretty easy to read:





Excuse: Is this really helping my kid? It sure doesn't seem like it.

Reply: Look, if you read the same book to your kid every night, in a monotone, and never discuss what happened in the story or whether they liked it, your kid will still learn language patterns and the concepts of print, like reading left to right and front to back. Would it be more helpful if you tried different books, discussed what new words meant, used expression and talked about the book afterwards? Of course. But reading aloud is a cumulative thing, it's not going to be as obvious that your child has learned something from one day to the next.

I'm Failing at Being Non-Judgmental

So I read this post about sharing.

I refrained from commenting on it, because I think it's rude to leave comments like, "You're raising your kid to be an asshole." But, um, obviously, I have a problem with this lady's parenting in this instance.

To recap for those of you too lazy to click the link (and those of you too tired to remember what it said); this mom never forces her kid to share - whether it's his toy or a communal toy. She thinks that always giving in to what another kid wants makes the other kid selfish and spoiled. But not hers.

Did I mention that she has one kid, who's still in preschool? I mean, she never has to worry about sharing when she's also trying to cook dinner or answer email or whatever.

I have never had a specific policy on sharing. My general policy on parenting is, "Don't raise assholes." Like, if my kid brings his own toy to the park, no, he doesn't have to share it. Especially with some random kid who wants it. I think it's asshole-ish to demand things that belong to total strangers, so if my kids want something someone else has, too bad.

The inner tube gets shared a lot at the pool. But only with friends, ever since the day we lent a kickboard to seemingly nice kid we'd just met and it never came back. 

However.

When the toys are community property, I make my kids share. The mom in the original post shares how her son loves to ride this one toy at the rec center, so he'll often stay on it for the entire hour and a half play time - even if other kids want it. I think that's asshole behavior. It's not his toy, it belongs to all the kids there. So they should all get a turn. Period. Her son's needs don't get to supersede everyone eles's just because he got to the toy first.

I wonder about these people.

I wonder if they're the people who linger over coffee at restaurants while people are waiting for the table. I wonder if they're the people who take up two parking spots because there were two available when they got to the mall stupid early. I wonder if they're the people who take the cool (supposedly communal) sand toys home from the community sand box just because their kids like them. I wonder if they're the people who go under the speed limit in the left passing lane. I wonder if they're the people who don't pull all the way up in the car pool lane, so that everyone else has to wait while their kid walks ten fewer feet to the school door. I wonder if they're the people who think being first means they are more important than everyone else.

I'm not saying they are, of course. I'm not saying that this kid will be. I'm not judging. . .exactly. I'm just. . .questioning. Yeah, that's it. I'm questioning.

How do you all handle sharing?

Friday I'm in Love: Old School Style

The wonderful Tracie tagged me in a get-to-know-you meme. The whole blogging meme/tagging people has fallen out of fashion (I think) lately, but I remember them fondly. Not only were they a great way to get to know other bloggers, they were an easy to write and easy to read fall back post. 

A-B-C's Of Me

Elaine and Jennifer have prepared this special meme for us; to help us jump into our time machines, and blog like it is 2006.


Alphabet Meme

A. Attached or Single? Attached. Ten years. Damn, I'm old.

B. Best Friend? The truth is that all my friends are the best. But my husband is definitely my closest.

C. Cake or pie? Cake, no question. I mean, I'll eat pie, but only if there's no cake around.

D. Day of choice? The day where nothing is scheduled.

E. Essential Item? My phone. I can't believe I'm one of those people.

F. Favorite color? Purple.

G. Gummy bears or worms? Gummy bears.
I like to bite their little gummy heads off. (I'm leaving Tracie's answer here because it's awesome and true for me as well)

H. Hometown? Ridgewood, NJ.

I. Favorite Indulgence? Sleeping in.

J. January or July? July. It's warm and there's no school. Plus, my birthday and anniversary. And fireworks.

K. Kids? Three amazing ones.

L. Life isn’t complete without? Reading.

M. Marriage date? July 5th.

N. Number of brothers/sisters? None, but I have amazing cousins to keep me in line.

O. Oranges or Apples? Apples.

P. Phobias? Worms.

Q. Quotes? There are too many to list here.

R. Reasons to smile? Sunshine. Kid laughter. Holding hands. Libraries. Beaches. Family.

S. Season of choice? Summer. I hate being cold.

T. Tag 5 People: Okay, this is hard. How about if you want to be tagged, consider yourself tagged.

U. Unknown fact about me? I'm pretty sure that anything the internet doesn't already know about me, no one wants to know about me.

V. Vegetable? Red bell peppers

W. Worst habit? Er, having so many bad habits that I can't pick which is the worst?

X. Xray or Ultrasound? Since my association with x-rays has to do with broken bones and pneumonia and I've only had ultrasounds while pregnant, I pick ultrasounds.

Y. Your favorite food? One favorite? Are you kidding? If I had one favorite food I'd be skinny. My favorite cuisine is probably Italian, though.

Z. Zodiac sign? Cancer. If I'd been born on time I'd be a Gemini, which is infinitely cooler.

Tell me some of your answers. Or all of your answers. Get your 2006 on.