I've always thought that people who claimed to be possessed had mental and/or physical problems that explained their behavior. Like that little girl in The Exorcist was probably molested by the priest or something.* So the fact that I'm sure I'm being possessed by some earth mother from the '60's means that I'm in the midst of a nervous breakdown and/or I really do have a brain tumor.**
The first time I was allowed to stay home by myself and make my own dinner, I "made" Pringles and Chips Ahoy. And 20 years later the first dinner I "made" in the first house I bought? Also Pringles and Chips Ahoy. Not only do I not cook, I don't even like meals. Except for breakfast. I could eat breakfast food all day long. I would probably weigh 10 more pounds if I knew how to cook bacon properly.
So yeah, about the possession. Recently I've begun to think that all this crap I eat and even the restricted crap I let my children eat (whole grain Goldfish! Wendy's chicken nuggets, not McDonald's!) is quite possibly truly bad for us. I mean, I've always known vegetables were healthier, but I figured kids with my genes wouldn't fall for the whole broccoli is a treat thing. Especially since, even as babies, they were chucking the broccoli across the room. But I didn't think I was feeding them anything that would actually hurt them. And then I heard about arsenic in apple juice. And suddenly I was thinking the Real Food movement might have a point.
It was when I downloaded one of Michael Pollan's books instead of a new mystery that I started to get concerned. And I got downright scared today when I told Hugmonkey I wouldn't buy him grapes because they weren't organic. Also, I may have ordered "The ABCs of Yoga for Kids" on Lovebug's last Scholastic book order.
Clearly, I've been possessed by an earth mother.
*I've never actually seen The Exorcist. But I know it involves possession and a priest.
**Don't you always think "brain tumor" whenever you get a headache? No?
