Dear Moms of Infants

There's a baby swim class at the same time as Hugmonkey's new swim class. It's great because when it's not Hugmonkey's turn, I can watch all the adorable babies. It's hard not to have baby lust when you like babies and your "baby" is 5.

Fortunately, the baby class ends at the same time as Hugmonkey's. I get to see the moms struggle to change diapers and rinse babies and get out of their own bathing suits and deal with crying and bottles and pacifiers on the floor. Meanwhile, I'm checking my phone because Hugmonkey is in a stall dressing himself. The baby lust recedes quickly.

Sometimes I participate in the conversations the moms are having while they wait their turns for the changing tables. Sometimes they even ask me questions as I lounge against the wall. Usually, I don't really get to answer because babies aren't conducive to conversations. Of course, neither is Hugmonkey when he's ready to get going and have lunch. Anyway, here is what I'd like to tell the "baby moms" I see every week. . .

  • Just buy the minivan. Even if you only ever have one kiddo, there will come a time in the not-too-distant future where you'll be hauling extra kids around. Trust me. 
  • No one cares whether your baby's socks match. 
  • Write down (even if it's just on Facebook) when especially cute or funny stuff happens, because your memory is never going to work as well as it used to. 
  • Baby swim class is a fine activity, but just because your kid likes it now, that doesn't mean he's destined to be the next Ryan Lochte. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing. 
  • The same holds true for baby music, baby gym, baby art and (for Brooklyn parents) baby DJ class. 
  • I know you can't imagine why I'm so entertained by "talking" to your baby, but you'll understand someday when your youngest child regularly performs 30 minute monologues on Minecraft. 


Tracie Nall said...

I always feel a little bit intimidated by those moms, because we never did any baby classes when Katarina was little.

Jendi said...

The age activities I did with my kids were library activities. I know that feeling of "Oh, they are so cute!" Then I remember how much work they are and how much I just wanted to get them out of diapers! :)

Love the tips!

Steph Lovelady said...

Baby swim class, that makes me nostalgic, too. We did one with N when he was a baby. I didn't get around to any organized activities with J until she was a toddler but the one I remember most fondly was music class.

Still, I wouldn't really want to go back to baby days at this point in my life.

Victoria said...

I find myself with baby syndrome a lot. I love babies but then I remember that they grow up quickly. My little ones didn't do any classes but I am always posting photos of them when they are younger for memories down the line. Thanks for linking up at the #ThrowbackThursdayLP.

Diane said...

I totally understand the minecraft thing. My step daughter who used to think video and computer games for for boys is obsessed with minecraft and often lectures us about all the wonderful things she has built.

tara pittman said...

I get my baby fix every week working in my church nursery. I too long for another baby at times, my youngest is 5 also

Jamie Tomkins said...

This is when I'm thankful that my son is 13....well, for a minute or so, anyway. :( #ThrowbackThursdayLP

Yona Williams said...

lol @ no one cares if your baby's socks match. This makes me laugh because I remember when my best friend from out of town visited and her lil' one took her shoes off...her socks mismatched, and it tickled me. She was a pleasant handful.

OMGoodness...Minecraft is mind-numbing to watch and listen to...my nephew talks aloud and even records himself with the iPad playing Minecraft...seriously????