Dear Judy Cox of Orem, Utah

Dear Ms. Cox,

     When I heard you bought $500 worth of t-shirts because you found them pornographic, I didn't know whether to laugh or to cry.

pacsun.com

In a world where many magazines, tv shows, movies and stores show sexy women in their underwear, your stand against these particular t-shirts seems a bit silly. Have you ever seen the displays at a Victoria's Secret store? Have you seen what passes for bathing suits these days? Has your son ever seen Sports Illustrated? A lingerie catalog? An episode of The Bachelor? Do you honestly believe your teenaged son has never seen a picture of a woman in her underwear? And here's the thing; if he hasn't, he's imagined enough of them that this t-shirt isn't going to truly shock him, no matter what he may have told you.

But my bigger problem is your assumption that a voluptuous female body is inherently pornographic. That sexy is the same as pornographic. That a woman who is not hiding her body is somehow dirty or shameful. That sexual arousal is a cause for shame. These shirts depict no sex acts. The models are consenting adults. The shirts are tasteless, not pornographic.

If you'd like to be outraged, be outraged that young women are repeatedly shown that to be sexy is all that matters. Be outraged that there are no comparable t-shirts with sexy young men in their underwear. Be outraged that this is what sells in our country.

Or maybe take your $500 and donate it to a group that works on the real outrages in our country. Use it to stop human trafficking, or to help victims of sexual violence, or to teach young men (like your son) to stop sexual violence, or to stop sexism in advertising. But that wouldn't get you all over Buzzfeed, would it?

Instead of trying to hide sexiness from your son, teach him how to handle it respectfully. Instead of eliminating these t-shirts from the world, work to eliminate the sexism that inspired them. Instead of throwing a tantrum, start a revolution.

                                                                                                     Yours sincerely,
                                                                                                        TripleZmom