Class Mother

So on one of the many forms I filled out for Ironflower's preschool, I indicated that I would be willing to be a class mother. I thought I just said I would help when I could, but maybe my willingness to help at all qualified me for class motherhood.

Now, the whole idea of "class mother" ticks me off in the way "policeman" and "fireman" do - why assume a gender when there are perfectly viable options (police officer and firefighter, class PARENT)? But, this is Bergen County - where the men work long hours in the city and the women wear cute clothes to go to the park (yes, I'm totally generalizing, but I grew up here, I can). Only a handful of fathers even showed up for the back to school night, so it doesn't surprise me that all the class parents are women. It just surprises me that they ASSUME that's how it will be.

I went to the initial meeting with trepidation, not having gotten high-heeled sandals or a manicure recently. Fortunately, the women were more casually dressed this time (maybe because they knew there'd be no men there?) and everyone seemed nice enough. But my Goddess, what a lot of work there is. Fundraisers galore, field trips and class parties to plan. My co-class mom and I are having our parent meeting next week (yes, each class has to have its own meet and greet, as if back to school night and drop offs and pick ups were not enough).

This meeting will be to hit everyone up for money. Yeah, that'll be fun. Can't wait.

I'm sure part of my shock at the duties of class parents comes from my teaching experience in the 'hood. We never had official class parents, we barely had a PTA. And while I had many wonderful and helpful parents, none of them planned things for me. Or ran the fundraisers for me. Or bought me gifts. Or did half the stuff I'm going to have to do.

The Klan Meeting. . Er. . .Nursery School Parent Night

So last night was my first back-to-school night as a parent. It was weird walking into a school's hall as an unknown mom instead of a popular staff member. And then it freaked me out a little bit to realize that nearly everyone there was white. I used to teach in an urban school, so I'm more used to being the only white chick than to being the only white chick not wearing high heels. Or the only white chick without a tan. This place was pale enough to be a Klan meeting.

It was pretty awful at first. Everyone seemed to know each other, or be with a spouse (Hot Guy had to stay home with the kids) or be designer-clad. And this is the cheap preschool. I'm much better at including people than at being included, but I did manage to chat with a few people during the main meeting.

Things got a lot better when I went to Ironflower's classroom. Her teacher's presentation was better than mine ever was, she seems great. AND I had so much fun chatting with two other moms (who did know each other and looked very glamorous but turned out to be former teachers) that I actually had a good time.

The only problem is that on one of the many forms I filled out to enroll Ironflower, I must have checked "yes" to be a class parent. I got a list of duties along with the regular info pack last night. The list is long. Two of things on it are extorting money for teacher gifts and calling people to harass them about volunteering. If I was good at such things I would be selling Mary Kay and have a pink car, not trying to write and driving a seven year old Subaru. I can only hope someone else was dumb enough to be co-class parent with me. And I hope she's outgoing (I could be pc and say she or he, which I would do in most situations, but there were only about 10 fathers out of a hundred parents there last night) and likes to bother people.

I hope my failings as a class parent don't make Ironflower unpopular.