Happy 9th Birthday, Ironflower!

Dear Ironflower,

     Every time I find it hard to believe that you are 9 - like when I see a picture like this:

Or like this:

You then say something so smart or hilarious that I am reminded that you are, in fact, an amazing kid - but not so much my little girl anymore. You've handled the transition to the notably difficult third grade curriculum so well, on top of many hours of dance a week and having to wear uncomfortable spreaders. You are so capable. 

You are a devoted friend and would prefer to be friends with everyone. You try to be inclusive and are able to get along with so many different ages of kids. That makes me so proud of you. You also play so well with your brothers; despite needing some alone time in your room sometimes, you are close to both of them. 

Though you've been reading for a while, I feel like this year you began a devotion to the printed word that rivals my own. You read for fun. You'll read just about anything put in front of you, but you have definite preferences. And you've become a definite Harry Potter nerd, with a love of Hermione that makes me tear up a little. 

I love that you still play with your American Girl dolls and Legos and your imagination. You are (very sensibly) not rushing off into crushes on One Direction and only being able to entertain yourself with screens. You're already asking for a phone, though. 

You are great at standing up for yourself and speaking your mind. Even when it's not necessarily the best time to do that. I hope with all my heart that you stay this independent and strong-willed forever; even though it might drive us crazy during your teen years. 

You are still interested in sea animals and ocean life. I love that you are so against Sea World after learning about some of their practices from the young woman at Clearwater Marine Aquarium. We don't even need to watch Blackfish, which I'm pretty sure would break your heart. 

Ironflower, I love you so much and I'm so honored to be your mom. Much as I may occasionally miss the little girl you used to be (I do so love buying flouncy dresses), I adore the young woman you're becoming. 

       Love,           

 Mommy       

In Which I Compare Myself To A Real Housewife

I'm going to admit this publicly, even though it shames Hot Guy: I watch all of the Real Housewives shows. I even watch their aggressive cousin, Mob Wives. I will sometimes think about these people as I go through my day. I've been known to read gossip blogs about them. I comfort myself with the knowledge that at least I haven't bought any of their books or products. It's not that I'm a FAN or anything. . . .

But I've wasted enough of my life on these shows to know that most of these bitches are delusional, narcissistic or both. So I should not have been shocked when one of them threw a hissy fit because her daughter eloped. (It was on last week's Real Housewives of Orange County, for those of you keeping score.) All the mom kept saying was how the daughter had deprived her of planning the wedding and picking out the dress together and all these occasions she'd dreamed about since the daughter was born.

I'm pretty sure that if one of my kids elopes without telling me, I'm not going to whine about missing wedding stress. I'll probably be bummed I missed the ceremony, but I've actually never fantasized about anything to do with my children's weddings. Possibly because my oldest is 7, though according to Vicki (the Real Housewife) I should have been thinking about wedding dress shopping the second they cut her out of me.

I spent half a second worrying that a Real Housewife loved her kids more than I loved mine, and then I realized that throwing a hissy fit about your 25 year old eloping is not a sign of a loving parent. I don't spend a lot of time fantasizing my kids' futures, because I figure my job is to make sure that they can have happy and productive futures - not fulfill my wish list.

Although I do have fantasies of traveling around Europe together. To be honest, though, I also have fantasies of traveling around Europe with just Hot Guy. And alone. I guess what I'm saying is that the kids aren't a required part of my European fantasy, like they would be about walking a kid down the aisle or whatever.

Except that I don't think I've ever fantasized about a wedding. Why? Because I spent my youth fantasizing about my prom and watching movies that fetishized it (Pretty in Pink came out approximately 2 years before my junior prom, okay?) and it was such a letdown. I had fun, but there was no romance, no magical moment, no suddenly being the belle of the ball. Hell, no one even dropped pig blood on the prom queen. If prom wasn't all it was cracked up to be, why would I daydream about a wedding?

What I'd really like to know is, which one of us is normal? Do you all daydream about your kids' weddings like Housewife Vicki? Would you be pissed if your kid eloped? Or would you send a gift and start demanding grandchildren, like I'm going to?