Like most people, I suck at keeping noble New Year's resolutions. If you read anything about making changes in your life, you know that making small, attainable steps is the way to create real change. But you can't tell that from people's typical resolution lists; lose weight, stress less, take up yoga, bring about world peace. . . . . I mean, those aren't small, actionable steps. Which is why normal people typically give up on their resolutions before Valentine's Day.
But not me. Not this year. I have chosen a small, actionable step for each of my 2014 resolutions. If I can accomplish these smaller tasks, then I will have kept my New Year's resolutions and next year I can be all smug* about how I kept my resolutions in 2014.
1. Bring about world peace - I will stop fighting with Phil Robertson fans on Twitter. Less fighting = more peace, right?
2. Lose weight - I will cut my hair soon. I have really thick hair, so I'm relatively sure this will help me lose at least 5 pounds.
3. Become more fit - I will use headphones and watch TV on my phone instead of reading while I'm at the gym, because I always slow down when I'm reading something good.
4. Stress less - I will block the Phil Robertson fans on Twitter, so I don't even have to resist the temptation to fight with them. That's almost as good as meditation, right?
5. Be more patient with my children - I will have a cocktail every night while they're doing their homework.
6. Spend more quality time with my children - I will teach them how to make me the perfect gin and tonic.
7. Be more organized - I will add an "organization" board to Pinterest.
8. Practice self-care regularly - I will stop watching Fox News when I'm at the gym.
9. Save more money - I will stop checking Zulily and ThredUp when I don't actually need something.
10. Take my writing more seriously - I will stop describing my part-time profession as, "writing crap on the internet".
What are your resolutions this year?
*And then in 2015 I can work on being less smug, which really can't be that hard, right? It's like I've set myself up for TWO years of resolution success. I'm a genius! But I won't be a smug one after 2015, I promise.