5/22/2014

Rental Car Companies Are Smarter Than Camille Paglia

When I started reading Camille Paglia's (if you don't know of her, think of her as this wild professor who likes to analyze pop culture obsessively and contradict people for fun) essay on under-aged drinking, I was startled to find myself agreeing with her.

It is stupid that people can quit school, fight in a war, get married, be parents and/or vote at 18, but they can't buy booze until they're 21. I mean, it's much easier to care for a bottle of vodka than it is to care for a baby. . .or even a rifle.

But then, as Camille lamented that teenager drinkers would be better off in public bars, learning to have conversations, than they were at frat parties. . .

I realized that no, I don't actually agree with Camille Paglia on something.

Camille is 67 years old. While that makes her young compared to some of the people at my gym, I think we can safely say that she hasn't been a teenager for a while.  And though I haven't either, I did spend a lot of my youth drinking. I suspect Camille was busy actually studying, or she would remember that many bars - especially the kind that appeal to younger people - are filled with fucking idiots. Karaoke? Wet t-shirt contests? Shots? Dance offs? And these are the people we think are mature enough to drink? Let 18 year olds in and there'll be people in wet t-shirts trying to drink the most shots while singing Justin Bieber songs.

Also, even people who can drink legally often attend parties. In fact, Animal House, which was based on the authors' experiences at Dartmouth in the 60s, was about a time when 18 year olds could drink in bars, yet they chose to do it at frat houses sometimes. Also, she claims that date rape has grown more common since teenagers were "forced" to start drinking in private homes. So not only is she clueless about teen party culture, she is equally clueless about date rape. First of all, it's reported more now. Second of all, it's recognized more now than it was back in the day. And third of all, date rape happens when you hang out with a date rapist - whether that's at a bar or at party. Or a library.

Camille would also like to believe that because people in Europe are more relaxed about youthful drinking, with lower drinking ages and sharing of wine at family dinners and whatnot, their teenagers don't act stupid around alcohol. This sounds logical, but we can't just rely on what just sounds logical when we write essays for national magazines (or blog posts, come to think of it). We have to do a little research and see if FACTS back up what we think sounds logical. In this case, they do not. If you don't want to read the very long study I easily found on Google, here's the summary:

Recent data from representative surveys provide no evidence that young Europeans drink 
more responsibly than their counterparts in the US. 
 A greater percentage of young people from all of the European countries except 
Iceland report drinking in the past 30 days. 
 A majority of the European countries included in this study have higher intoxication 
rates among young people than the United States and about one third of the countries 
have equal or lower rates to the United States; and 
 For a majority of these European countries, a greater percentage of young people 
report having been intoxicated before the age of 13. 


But the real reason that I think rental car companies are smarter than Camille Paglia is that they understand what she doesn't; the brain isn't fully mature until you are about 25. Now, I have known plenty of mature and wonderful people who made great decisions in their late teens and early twenties, but the law can't just apply to those people. That's why if you show up at the car rental agency and show them your Google employee i.d. and paycheck stub and stable partner and great credit rating, they still won't let you rent a car if you're under 25.

And if you can't be trusted with a rental car, should you really be trusted with booze? Or guns? Or the decision to fight for your country? Or whether to star in porn movies?

I think we should take a page from the car rental companies and move the other age limits UP to match the one for booze, not bring booze down.

Hell, maybe they should all be moved up to 25. What do you think?










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