Trophies For (Almost) Everyone

There is a line, which has probably been stepped on by so many parents that we can't see it anymore, between lying to children and being needlessly harsh to children. I've read  a bunch of articles and blog posts lately lamenting the fact that every kid gets a trophy now. Of course, I've also read a lot of articles and blog posts talking about all the negative effects of the pressure high stakes testing and travel sports put on children.

The trophies above belong to Lovebug. They cover swimming, soccer and baseball. Lovebug has never won a championship in any of those sports. In baseball one year, I don't even think they even kept score. I can hear all the anti-trophy people bristling from here. But the thing is, Lovebug knows he didn't win a championship in any of the sports. He knows he wasn't the best on his soccer team. He knows he didn't win too many races in swimming. He thinks he got those trophies because he showed up at the practices and the games and tried his best every damn time.

And I refuse to see a problem with that. Showing up and working hard is going to get him way farther in life than thinking only the kids lucky enough to be on the winning team (because at the rec level in kindergarten, first and second grade, there's a lot of luck involved) get trophies. I believe that trophies should reward the qualities we want to instill in our kids - hard work, perseverance, teamwork, handling defeat and even winning gracefully.

That also explains why I don't think every kid should get a trophy.

Last summer, Lovebug and Ironflower joined our local pool's swim team. It's not competitive in the way that the year-round swim teams are, but meets are held in other towns and practices are every day (not that you had to go to them every day).

Lovebug fell in love with it, and Ironflower fell in love with the fact that a lot of her friends were on the team. We went to most practices and we went to all the meets. The meets, by the way, involved ribbons for first, second, third and participation. I have no idea where the participation ribbons are, but each kid has their (admittedly few) place ribbons hanging in his/her room. Kids know when they haven't done well and it's insulting to any kid over 5 to think otherwise.

Anyway, at the end of the season there was a potluck dinner and trophies were awarded. For everyone who had worked hard all season, etc., etc. I was cool with this, until a couple of trophies were presented to kids I did not recognize. By blatantly eavesdropping, I was able to learn that the kids had never gone to practice and had only gone to one meet. I was appalled.

Those kids got trophies because their parents had paid for them to be on the team. They did not work hard, show up for practice or even win a bunch of races.

Trophies should be for everyone. Except the kids who don't work for them.

Friday I'm In Love: Full of the Awesome

Video of awesomeness:

Photo of awesomeness:

Okay, I know it's not a great photo, but it's my kiddos eating at the ice cream place I went to growing up, with two of them having my fave flavor, Vanilla Fudge. 

Post of Awesomeness: So You're Having (Another) Baby

Fact of Awesomeness: My kids have really enjoyed being on the swim team this summer. I have been proud of their hard work and the way they rooted for their teammates. But for the love of all that is holy, I am so relieved that tomorrow is the last meet. 

Books of Awesomeness: Part historical fiction, part mystery, all awesome. The next one can't come out fast enough! 

                                              

Magazine of Awesomeness: Smithsonian magazine. I have no idea why I have never read this one before, but I'm so glad to have discovered it now. The last issue helped me understand theoretical physics and bomb sniffing dogs. So much better for the brain than understanding which celebrities are going to get divorced next. Er, to be honest, though, I still read those magazines too. I need a lot of distraction at the gym.

Mildly Embarrassing Monday: I Failed At Doing Nothing

Last summer, we did nothing. Nothing but going to the local lake, the library and the Bronx Zoo, I mean. And it was delightful. Except when the children were trying to kill each other. Or when I got so used to sleeping in that going back to school was harder on me than it was on them. But mostly it was delightful. So delightful, in fact, that I'd planned to do it again this summer. I bragged about it. I told everyone that it was my new summer plan.

But this summer Ironflower has to go to dance camp. All the dance company members have to go, so if she wants to be in the company. . .she has to be there. It's only for a week in August. But still, it's something. So of course Lovebug deserves to go to basketball camp for a week. To be fair. And since we were already doing those somethings, I let myself be talked into the swim team at the lake.

Not like it's a hardship to go to the lake. 

But I also signed the older kids up for acrobatics class. It's just once a week. In the afternoon. They're dying to go. It's only an hour a week. 

But when I look at our summer calendar now, with the swim practices and meets and the library activities and the acro class and the two camp weeks. . .it sure doesn't look like nothing.