Reading Worksheet Alternatives

I have no problem with worksheets, at least to a point. They can be helpful, especially for practicing math facts and spelling words. But most of them don't require problem solving or critical thinking. With reading especially, I haven't discovered too many curricula or commercial workbooks that actually help kids learn.

And let's face it, after kindergarten, most kids aren't exactly enthused about doing worksheets. Not that I blame them.

So I like to force  encourage my kids to complete worksheet alternatives. In the summer, we use Summer Notebooks that cover reading, writing and math.  But if you're just looking to keep your kids accountable for their reading, or to work on reading skills, I have some other suggestions.

1. Word Family Four Square: Fold a piece of paper into fourths, then write a word family (middle and ending sounds of short words) with a blank spot in front at the bottom of each fourth. Kids need to fill in the blanks (such as putting "p" in front of "_en" to make the word "pen" and draw a picture of the object. Here is one Hugmonkey did: 

   

   I didn't make Hugmonkey draw with much detail here, as I wanted him to get done quickly. In the classroom, I insisted on detailed illustrations in full color.  

2. Vocabulary Four Square: Basically, the same idea as above, but instead of a word family kids practice with a prefix or a suffix (or two). Ironflower's (unfinished because she has a pile of homework tonight) looks like this: 
   
3. With kids who are reading chapter books with few (or no) illustrations, I love to have them draw pictures of key characters and scenes to check for comprehension. If the author repeatedly describes a character as "tall and dark-haired" and your kiddo draws that character as a short person with blonde hair, then some rereading needs to be done. 
4. You can do something similar with younger kids by reading them a picture book without showing them the pictures. Then have them draw a key scene in the story. And don't let them stress about their draw skills - encourage them to use stick figures if they need to (this goes for older kids too). 
5. I mention this all the time, but only because it's so much fun. Have kids take a favorite book and turn it into a board game. Trivial Pursuit about Harry Potter, for example. Coming up with trivia questions and answers really forces them to dig deeply into the book. But this isn't limited to older kids. If your little one loves Eric Carle books, have her create a Candyland board based on his books. Then you all can play the games together on Family Game Night. 
6. Have them write down words whose meanings they're not clear on, either while they read or while you read to them. Then show them how to look words up in the dictionary to find the actual meanings. If you want to extend this, you can then have them copy the meaning and use the word in a sentence. 
7. Kids can create written or illustrated (or both) timelines of what happens in their books. Before they start, talk about the story - what were the major events? what do you think is important for other readers to remember? - so that they don't wind up writing down every little detail that happened, especially if they've just read a challenging chapter book. 
8. Sequels don't have to be reserved for lazy Hollywood producers. Let kids write and/or illustrate sequels to their favorite books and movies. 
9. For non-fiction fans, you can encourage them to write down the five most important facts they learned from a book, chapter or magazine article. If you've got a kid who's been reading shark books for the last month, challenge him/her to write his own fact-based shark book. 
10. Kids might also have fun with adapting the format of their reading. They can turn a book (or a chapter) into a play, or write letters as characters, create a newspaper front page for the main character's town, or write blog posts as a character. 

The Ultimate Guide to Teaching Your Kid to Read

Let me preface this by saying that I did not teach my kids to read. I have taught hundreds of kids to read as a teacher and tutor, but I did not teach my own. And unless you are a homeschooling parent or your kid goes to lousy schools, the burden (or joy, depending on your outlook) of teaching your kid to read should not be on your shoulders.

However, I did do some things to make it easier for my kids to learn to read and to make them good readers once they got the hang of it. And I might wind up teaching Hugmonkey to read this summer, just because he is so desperate to catch up to his brother and sister. Anyway. . .

I hear a LOT of parents talk about teaching their kids to read. Especially preschool parents. While a few kids are ready to read in preschool, most are not actually reading. They are memorizing books and words, which is fine but not very effective in the long run. It doesn't matter if your kid could "read" The Cat in the Hat at 4 when she is unable to comprehend chapter books in third grade. I'm not saying (necessarily) that your kid will turn into a great reader if you follow my advice, but it will definitely help.

The Ultimate Guide

1. Read to your kid every day. Reading together and talking about books is a great predictor of future reading success. And once your kid is reading, reading together can still help with vocabulary and comprehension. 
2. Introduce the concept of the alphabet, but don't do flashcards with your 2 year old. Point out letters on signs, read alphabet books, that kind of thing. 
3. Begin teaching phonological awareness. This awareness lets kids understand and manipulate the sounds in words. If they can't do that, then "sounding out" unknown words will be next to impossible. 
4. Emphasize rhyming. The ability to recognize rhymes as a young child is a huge predictor of future reading success. I wrote all about teaching kids rhyming skills in this post. 
5. As your kid heads into kindergarten, I would introduce the concept of "sight words". These are words that you recognize on sight, without having to sound out (decode) them. Your child's name, for example, is hopefully a sight word at this point. If your child is eager to learn to read, you can try sight word flash cards in kindergarten. If your kiddo isn't motivated? Don't force it yet. Try again later in the school year.  
6. Begin teaching phonics; this links the sounds heard in words with the letters that make those sounds. It is what helps us "sound out", or decode, unknown words. 
7. So, now your kiddo is reading. . .but is s/he understanding what is read? That can be a challenge for a lot of kids, especially kids who memorized sight words and phonics rules easily. Comprehension skills are something that parents can work on at home easily. Even if you just discuss what you read together each night, you are helping your child learn to reflect on text.
8. Skip the workbooks. Please. Your kid is much better off reading Captain Underpants for the 10th time than doing mind-numbing "comprehension" worksheets. You can come by next week for worksheet alternatives. 
9. If you're look for more detailed instructions and information, please visit Reading Rockets. It's the best reading site I've found on the web. 
10. Books early readers will love:

We Are in a Book! (An Elephant and Piggie Book)
Can I Play Too? (An Elephant and Piggie Book)
Dr. Seuss's Beginner Book Collection (Cat in the Hat, One Fish Two Fish, Green Eggs and Ham, Hop on Pop, Fox in Socks)
Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?
10 Little Rubber Ducks
David Gets In Trouble
No, David!
Yo! Yes? (Scholastic Bookshelf)
Hi! Fly Guy
Scholastic Reader Level 2: Super Fly Guy
City Signs

Parenting Thursday: Celebrating Seuss

In case you didn't know, Sunday is Dr. Seuss' birthday. For the past I-don't'-know-how-many years, that day, or a day close to it,  has been celebrated as "Read Across America Day". While I did cool things with the day back when I was a teacher, as a parent, it's been more, "Oh crap, I totally forgot. Let's read some Dr. Seuss books at bedtime!"

I am pretty sure they took my organizational and planning skills out when they were performing my c-sections. Who knew that those skills were stored in the uterus?

What was I talking about?

Oh right, Dr. Seuss and his birthday. Even though I've always thought it was kinda weird to celebrate the birthdays of people who can no longer enjoy birthday cake, the kids and I are going to celebrate it this year. By more than just reading Dr. Seuss books at bedtime, though we'll probably do that too.

The web is filled with adorable crafts and snacks that celebrate Dr. Seuss. But if you'd like to encourage some thinking, check out the following activity:

1. Reread your kids' favorite Dr. Seuss books with them. 
2. As you read, talk about the words in the story: Which ones did Dr. Seuss make up? How can you tell? Can you still figure out what they mean? Which are you favorites?
3. Encourage your kids to make up their own words. If they struggle, have them come up with nonsense words that rhyme with their names (Jack could come up with vack, for example). This is a great time to talk about rhyming, syllables, the need for vowels, or prefixes and suffixes, depending on your kids' ages and language knowledge. 
4. Have older kids write down their list of nonsense words, have younger kids help you sound out and write their nonsense words. 
5. Hugmonkey's word was "snoobits", which I wrote and he copied onto writing paper. 
6. Have younger kids pick one word to draw. You can have them write the word themselves or you can write it for them. 
7. Let them draw their word and have them describe it to you as they do. Hugmonkey's "snoobits" is a dog like Snoopy, who is blue and is eating cheese - in case you couldn't get that from his illustration above. :) 
8. With older kids, have them put their word into a sentence, then make an illustration to match. Or have them use all their nonsense words in a story and have them illustrate that. 

The pictures probably won't turn out as cute as the orange slices turned Cat in the Hat faces I saw on Pinterest, but your kids will learn a lot about language from it. 

Teaching Tuesday: Flashcards

When Ironflower was a baby, someone gave her a set of picture flashcards. They were lovely photographs of things like fish and horses, each with the word printed on the front and some facts to share on the back. Ironflower loved them. She loved to chew on them and fling them under the couch.

I don't think I ever made it through one of the fact paragraphs before she yanked the card out of my hands.

Which just goes to show that Ironflower was born being pretty damn smart; babies do not need flashcards, they need conversations. In other words, if you're reading this post because you want to use flashcards with your baby, toddler or preschooler, step away from the computer and play with them instead. Or chat with them as you go for a walk around the block.

That said, I am not against all flashcards. For older kids, flashcards can be a great way to memorize sight words, math facts and foreign language vocabulary. But there's no need to waste money on buying flashcards; have kids make their own with markers and index cards. Then spend 5 minutes every day on them.

When I taught, we practiced with flashcards every single day. A few minutes during reading, a few minutes during math. In reading, I would hold up a flashcard and the kids would say the word ("The!"), spell the word ("T! H! E!") and say it again. In math, they would say the whole number sentence. So if I held up a card that said, "4 + 6", they would say, "4 + 6 = 10". I usually focused on 10 cards at a time, 5 for kids who were struggling. After a week or so, I would test kids individually on the cards to see if they were ready for the next set. When testing, I considered them "correct" if they got the correct answer within two seconds. The point of sight word, and math fact, flashcards is automaticity, after all.

Vowel digraphs, like "oo" and "ou", can also be memorized through flashcards. I have to admit to being terribly lax about doing flashcards with my own kids, but now that work is getting a little more difficult for Ironflower, I'm probably going to start. I want her to know her multiplication and division facts through 12 and her Greek/Latin suffixes and prefixes before the year is over. Of course, Lovebug will undoubtedly jump in on this and be twice as bored in third grade as he is in second but I guess it'll be practice for all the boring meetings he'll have to sit through some day.

Teaching Tuesday: Homework, The Sequel

We all know how I feel about homework in general. But let's just say that your kid's homework is appropriate and enriching and everything. Or we can say that you think even repetitive homework teaches valuable life lessons, so would I please shut the hell up about how much I hate it?

Fair enough. 

So, your kid has to do his homework. How can you make that happen without wanting to commit grievous bodily harm on yourself, your kid and/or the teacher? 

The first thing to realize is that you can't. You set up the right conditions, you can have expectations, you can even have rewards and consequences in place, but ultimately homework is your kid's problem. Do not, under any circumstances, do it for her. The teacher does not give a shit if you know how to multiple double digit numbers, okay? S/he wants to see if your kid can. And if your kid can't, it's best if the teacher finds that out as soon as possible. Preferably by looking at your kid's homework. Your job is to check that your kid completed the assignment and followed the directions (such as multiplying the numbers, not adding them). 

The teacher does also not need a note from you written on the homework explaining why little Bobby couldn't/wouldn't do it. If your kid really can't complete that night's homework because of some valid reason (death in the family, zombie horde attack), then write a note or email to the teacher explaining the issue and have your kid turn in the homework the next day.

Now, even though I'm not a fan of homework, I am a fan of school consequences for not doing it. Basically because if the teacher doesn't make kids accountable for their homework, they're not going to feel like they need to be accountable for any other work that s/he assigns. As for home front, I'm more of a believer in privileges. Like, no computer/TV/DS/phone/Kindle/Legos/soccer until the homework is done. It's a lot hard to pull them away from the Wii to do homework than it is to get them to hurry through their homework to get to the Wii (not that I know this from personal experience, cough cough).

If your kid knows there's no fun until the homework is done, there will (probably) be less arguing about it. If your kid knows that you're not going to do it for him, there will (probably) be less whining about it. Eventually.

And if you have all the supplies that your kid could possibly need already gathered in one place, there will be less time wasted searching for a red marker or whatever.

I love a good caddy. They're nice and portable. But if your kid has a desk in a quiet area, that works too. 

Another way to beat homework frustration is to stop sitting by your kid while she works. Unless he's supposed to being read out loud to you or something, leave him to his own devices. Sure, she may waste time. And it's more likely that he'll misread the directions, or have messy handwriting. And that's okay. If you're talking her through every step of the way, she'll never learn to do it for herself. Plus, you are much less likely to want to beat your head against the wall as you tell him to focus on his work for the 487th time.

One other thing that seems to be working for us (and may not work on older kids, I've never actually assigned to work to any kids older than fourth grade and my oldest is only in third) is the separation of reading and homework. As in, even if they are required to read for 20 minutes every night (as Ironflower was last year and Lovebug will be soon), I don't make them do that on top of their homework. They do the homework, have the fun activity and then at bedtime we start the reading. We've always read for fun before bed anyway, so it doesn't seem so much like work - and now Ironflower often goes off to read just for fun. She usually reads more than 20 minutes a day, actually. Another time we squeeze in reading is at breakfast, because I am not a morning person and the less I have to talk in the morning the better.

What are your homework strategies? 

Friday I'm In Love: Why I Don't Get More Done

I would like to say that I love all kinds of books, but that would be a lie. I think some books really suck, especially those "written" by Bill O'Reilly. But I do love lots of different kinds of books. Really. Even though technically all I've been reading lately are British mystery novels.

I'm a little bit obsessed with them.

When Lovebug talks about his DS, my first thought is Detective Sergeant, not Nintendo product. Sometimes I wonder why DS Fry doesn't ask DI (Detective Inspector) Banks for help, until I remember they live in different books and are not, in fact, real. Though in most of Jasper Fforde's
books, there is such a thing as the BookWorld, where characters interact with each other when they're not appearing in their books.

Jasper Fforde's books are also British mysteries, albeit with some fantasy and science fiction elements. If you are an avid reader, start reading the first one, The Eyre Affair: A Thursday Next Novel, RIGHT NOW. No, seriously. You'll thank me later.

My latest discovery is Stephen Booth. Sort of similar to Peter Robinson's Detective Banks series, but maybe a bit darker. And more detailed; the landscape is really one of the main characters. I've been trying to space out my Booth books, which is the one advantage of coming to a series late - you  have a whole bunch to read before you start anxiously awaiting the next one. Not that this has been helpful with Song of Ice and Fire series (aka Game of Thrones), but fortunately most mystery authors are more prolific than George RR Martin.

But to space out my Booth books I've been reading Alison Weir. She does not write mysteries or fantasies, which will probably surprise the people who know my reading habits. But she does focus on British history, so at least I'm staying true to my Anglophile bias. She has written some historical fiction, which is much more grounded in reality than Philippa Gregory's stuff (though Philippa is fun) as well as some great biographies and histories of the Tudor era. For someone who is an historian by profession, she is surprising down to earth and direct when writing. Her book about Mary Boleyn, Anne's sister, is freaking fascinating.

Self-Portrait of Justification

What books should I add to my list? I'm going to run out of British authors soon, I expect.

Friday I'm in Love: Best Reading Web Sites

When I came up with the title for this post, I was thinking about Reading Rockets. Reading Rockets is

They really do enjoy reading. I swear. 

my favorite go to site for reading information and ideas. There are sections for parents, teachers, principals and librarians. The site covers everything very comprehensively, though sometimes it can be hard to find the specific information you want.

But then I realized that not everyone is an obsessive researcher like I am. Plus, if I only wrote about Reading Rockets, the "Best Reading Web Sites" title becomes inaccurate. It would have to be "Best Reading Web Site" and that just seems lame. Also, it's not the best site if you're looking for games for your kids, visual ideas or book suggestions. So.

Sites for Kids:

Starfall is great for preschoolers and kindergartners.

ClicknKids has really effective phonics and phonemic awareness lessons. It's not free, but you can use it for consecutive kids.

GameGoo, despite its horrible name, has some good early literacy skills games.

I'm not a big fan of online reading games for kids who already read. They should spend their time reading and responding to actual books.


Ideas for Parents:

No Time for Flash Cards has excellent ideas.

The International Reading Association, while geared for professionals, also has great ideas for parents.

What We Do All Day also has fun ideas for parents, with some really cool reading lists.

More great reading lists can be found on Kidlit.


If you're more visual and looking for teaching ideas:

I love this Pinterest Board by a fellow Jennifer.

This board from Scholastic has great resources too.

Check out this woman's literacy site for great teaching ideas. I wish she'd been my literacy coach.

Do you have any reading sites that you think I should check out? Let me know in the comments.

Teaching Tuesday: A Quick and Dirty Guide to Reading Components

I used to be a teacher. I don't want to go back to teaching, but I do miss it sometimes. Well, what I really miss is being "The Reading Bitch", which is what some of my colleagues used to call me. I think the actual title was reading coordinator, if there was an official title. Basically, it meant that I know a lot about how to teach reading and I'm not afraid to yell about it. 

The Basic Components of Reading

Exploritude. 

Is totally not a real word. But were you able to pronounce it? That's phonics.

High-dray-shun.

Also not a real word, but if you put the sounds together quickly it sounds like a real word. That's phonemic awareness.

Peter Piper picked a pack of pickled peppers. 

If you read that quickly three times, that's fluency. Also any time you read a word without having to sound it out phonetically.

I was born in a summer month that has 31 days and starts with "J". The sixteenth of that month is exactly two weeks after my birthday. 

If you now know when my birthday is, that's comprehension. Also, logic. They kind of go together.

Loquacious. Hydroponics. 

Those are cool vocabulary words that don't come up in everyday conversation. But the bigger your speaking vocabulary the easier reading will be.

The Dirty Truth

If your kid is struggling with and/or dislikes reading,  s/he is struggling with one or more of these components. If your kid's teacher can't tell you which one(s) s/he is struggling with and how you can help, then there's a problem with the teacher. Any teacher who can't articulate why a student is struggling with reading shouldn't be teaching reading.

Rainbow Magic: Crack or Whack?

As with most things, when Ironflower decided it was time to read, she took to it with a vengeance. And much like she went from walking belatedly to running two months later, so it was with reading. She went from reluctantly reading Mo Willems books to reading chapter books in about two months last fall.

Which led straight to the Rainbow Magic Seriesof chapter books. It's about two best friends who never seem to go to school and are allowed to roam around various towns and vacation spots unsupervised.

There are also fairies. Lots of fairies.

These fairies often require the girls' help. Because apparently having magic doesn't preclude you from requiring the help of a pair of ten year old girls. Usually, they are looking for something magical or someone magical.

I read a couple of the books with her, so I feel qualified to review them.

They seem like they were written by a couple of 13 year old girls nostalgic for their recent childhoods. Or possibly they were started as Tinkerbell fan fiction. Either way, the writing is pretty awful.

At least they are developmentally appropriate, I can say that much. And there are fairies for every child's (okay, girl's) interest. But the joy I felt went Ironflower assured me she could read them on her own? Same as I felt when HugMonkey was potty trained.

They come in sets of seven. Since publishing companies know it's very hard to say no when your child is dying for more books (guess what books Ironflower picked at the Book Fair this week?). Of course you can buy them individually or borrow them from the library, but Ironflower likes to read them in order. Plus, the sets come with jewelry. Girls who like to read books about fairies tend to like jewelry.

You guessed it, we got a new set at the Book Fair. I swear to got there have got to be 100  98 (multiple of 7, right?) of these books out by now. How many things can these fairies lose?

Whoever came up with these is a fucking marketing genius. And obviously hip to the 7 year old girl demographic. But so not a writer. Not like Francine Pascal, creator of my beloved Sweet Valley High series . . . .

Fine. I'm a hypocrite. They're obviously crack. Like Sweet Valley High. Dammit.

*Crack or whack is totally becoming a series on this blog.

Totally Going Off the Reservation

Alternative Title: Why They Used to Call Me the Reading Bitch

Alternative Alternative Title: One of the Many Reasons They Used to Call Me the Reading Bitch

This blog is generally about all the ways I fuck up as a parent, or how much I hate something, or television shows I love. I get that. But as most of you know, before I was a blogging mom, I was an elementary school teacher. And while I wasn't the best, I was pretty damn good at teaching reading.

That's the reason my former colleagues used to call me "The Reading Bitch". At least, that's why I like to think they did. There might have been other reasons. Ahem.

Lately I've been writing all these articles for The Bump. Well, for the content corporation that pays me. As of this writing, none of them have actually appeared on The Bump, but they're supposed to at some point in the not-too-distant future. I think. I believe many of them are based on actual questions of Bump readers, which makes me very sad. A lot of these people should not be procreating.

Anyway, one of the more intelligent questions had to do with early literacy skills. I had to answer it the content corporate way to get paid, but I couldn't stop thinking about it. And I remembered that I have a blog where I can say whatever the hell I want. So, even though I don't normally do this, I'm going to go all ex-Reading Bitch on you guys.

Q: How do get your preschooler ready to read?

A. Back away from the flashcards, workbooks and reading curricula. In fact, burn them. Most of them suck. And even if they don't totally suck, your preschooler shouldn't be doing them. It's not developmentally appropriate. Follow these steps instead:

1. Go to the library and get some picture books. Read them to your preschooler every day. Go to back the library and get some more. Repeat until your preschooler is 18 or so.

2. Use big words, and lots of them. Kids who know a lot of words will have an easier time learning to read.

3. Play with language. Make up rhymes. Stretch words out. Say each sound separately and have kids guess the word. Literacy professionals calls this phonological awareness. Or phonemic awareness. Or phonetic awareness. It depends. You don't have to call it anything. And if it freaks you out, pick up a lot of Dr. Seuss at the library.

Sometimes I want to start a blog called, "The Reading Bitch". Thoughts? Aren't there already a million teacher blogs out there?

Motherhood Changes You

Motherhood changes you. Before you give birth/adopt, you assume that change is about how you've always got this little person depending on you now. Right after you give birth/adopt, you think it's about the overwhelming love you are feeling. A few months later, you realize the change is actually in the shape of your body and in your ability to function on forty-five minutes of sleep. The changes then accelerate and multiply, until one day you catch yourself making fart jokes with your kids.

I mean, I didn't even fart in front of another human being until I was 30 (for those of you keeping score at home, yes, that does mean that I survived my entire first marriage without farting in front of him). I never really laughed at fart jokes (sex jokes were and are a different story). I certainly didn't make them.

Until my kids began to find them the funniest things on the planet. Well, fart jokes and the word "poop" in any context. At first, I merely sighed resignedly as my husband and kids cracked up about farts. Then I started grinning, just a little bit, because it's impossible not to smile when the rest of the family is laughing.

Hugmonkey had just yelled, "Poop!" 

Somewhere along the way, "Read it funny" happened. Hot Guy and I have always done accents and strange voices when reading to the children. He's an actor, I'm a former high school drama nerd, we like to turn read alouds into mini-performances. But in the last year or so, Hot Guy started changing the words of the stories he read over and over. Usually by adding in some fart jokes. As a writer this kind of horrified me, but I got over it when the kids reacted with so much joy. I even started to make my own changes here and there, though I generally avoided scatological humor.

Until the other night when Lovebug expressed disappointment that Daddy wasn't there to read the current family favorite, Big Bad Wolf Is Good. "I wanted him to read it funny, Mom," he explained when I said I would be happy to read it again.

"I can read it funny," I said confidently. Meanwhile, years of prissy behavior flashed through my head. The years of holding in farts and stopping my students from talking about this stuff and rolling my eyes at fart jokes and not discussing my ulcerative colitis because it's totally about poop and never leaving the door to the bathroom open and horror when my kid farted at the dinner table and fear of turning into the family on Honey Boo Boo. Then my son looked at me with a mixture of hope and shock. He handed me the book.

In the book, which is really cute (and you should use my link above if you want to buy it because then I will make 15 cents), Big Bad Wolf decides he wants friends. At the beginning, he theorizes he has no friends because, "Perhaps it's because I'm big and scary." I added in, "and have a stinky butt." All three kids laughed out loud. I felt like supermom.

So now, even though I'm not as good as Daddy, I get requests for "read it funny" when he's not around. My prissy side, which I thought was part of my DNA, has crawled off into the sunset, weeping. And the phrase "stinky butt" now makes me laugh too. Motherhood does change you.

In Which I Give Parenting Advice

I screw up a lot as a parent. I mean, I don't beat my children or feed them Red Bull and Pixie Sticks, but I'm so not the supermom I thought I would be. I'm trying to learn to be okay with that. One way I do that is by not reading too many blogs or books by moms who ARE supermoms. You know the ones I mean - the ones who homeschool their six kids with special needs while running successful photography businesses and cooking healthy gourmet dinners.

But recently I had this rare moment of feeling like a supermom and it occurred to me that I might have one area of expertise. Also, I need more blog topics that don't involve Rick Santorum or griping about my suburb.

My kids are very good readers. Like, other people have remarked upon it in public kind of readers. Plus, you know, I used to teach children how to read. So yay! I have an area of parenting expertise.

The thing I want to point out is that my kids are not gifted readers - they did not start reading before kindergarten, they are not devouring Harry Potter in the first grade. They're good, but they're normal good. Here's how they got that way (I think):

1. They've been read to almost every night since birth. Once in a while we have to skip it, or I read one book instead of three, but that's rare.

2. We still read picture books. Chapter books have their place and all, but they're really not developmentally appropriate until first grade. And even then, picture books can still teach kids A LOT.

3. No flashcards. That "Teach Your Baby to Memorize" program, or whatever it's called, is crap. Flashcards are okay for teaching kindergartners and/or first graders sight words, but that's it.

4. Lots of rhyming and word play. I sing stupid songs and say ridiculous rhymes all the time ("put on your shoes or you'll have to snooze," e.g.). Phonological awareness - the ability to distinguish and manipulate the sounds within words - is a huge predictor of reading success. Plus, rhyming entertains me when I'm saying the directions for the tenth time.

5. Workbooks are for handwriting and math facts. Seriously, no workbook is going to make your kid a good reader. But it might make them hate reading.

She's very excited that Santa brought her a book. 

6. Reread. Yeah, I know it sucks to read the same book over and over. But it's the perfect time to start pointing at each word. It also helps with comprehension. Try different accents for the different characters to make it more interesting.

7. Go to story time at your local library. Seeing other kids and adults interested in reading makes them think it's cool. Plus, you don't have to read!

8. Your kid may not really like it when you read, especially if you have a very active toddler. S/he may not want to sit still and listen. Let them walk around while you read, or try to just get through one short book every night. If you keep doing it consistently, your kid will start to like it.

9. Have books everywhere. Buy them at garage sales or library sales or get them from friends with older kids, but get as many as you can. Leave some in the bathroom, in the car and in each kid's room.

10. Make books a reward and a celebration. Let kids "earn" extra stories for good behavior. Instead of giving them cash for chores and/or the Tooth Fairy, let them earn books from Scholastic.

Now that I've written all this, of course, Hugmonkey will probably turn out to be a terrible reader or something. I'm pretty sure his mission in life is to kill any parenting confidence I might have. But these steps should work for your kids. Feel free to add your suggestions in the comments!

The Reading Bitch

Last night I watched the commercial for "Teach Your Baby To Read!", a product that teaches babies and toddlers to memorize the shapes on flashcards read. The urge I had to smack all those parents upside the head, well, it reminded me of my urges when I watch the kiddie pageant spectacle, Toddlers and Tiaras.

It's the same damn thing.

Poise, the ability to walk in high heels, reading. . .those are all great skills to have. Reading's obviously more important, but still. In our looks-obsessed society, the ability to wear lip gloss without it going all over your teeth can't be denied. But why the rush?

Four year olds don't need to look polished to do well at preschool.

And babies don't need to be able to read. And, in fact, they aren't actually reading. Sure, I saw them say the words on the cards, or gesture to indicate that they knew what the word was. But that's not actually reading. They didn't decode (aka "sound out") the word and they sure as hell didn't comprehend its meaning from the surrounding text.

I've taught lots of kids to read and I guarantee that none of them would have read for real any more quickly had they memorized the words for body parts as babies. If their parents had talked to them more, read them more stories and/or not let them spend all night watching horror movies, that might have helped. But this stupid program? Not so much.

A colleague once referred to me as "The Reading Bitch", that's how into teaching reading I was. I might have been a little militant. I might have distributed timelines and scopes and sequences and lesson plans to my elementary school teacher colleagues a little obsessively.

And yet my baby has no idea what letters even are. But I have gotten him to sit still long enough to finish listening to "Touch and Feel Farm". I'm kinda proud of that. Because it's age-appropriate.

I suppose in a world where first graders have cell phones and grandmothers attend Botox parties, age-appropriate isn't a very popular concept. Sure, everyone clucks over the pageant kids, made up and hairsprayed like teenage prom queens, but they still have their own shows. And I've yet to hear anyone talk about, much less criticize, "Teach Your Baby To Read".

The truth is, kids who memorize easily (or very early), often have a hard time reading more difficult text when they hit second or third grade. And forget about developing their thinking skills. Memorization does jack for those. But all those parents can now brag that their one year olds can read, which I guess is more imporant than age-appropriate or thinking.

Score another one for the assholes.

Not As Impressive As It Looks

When I said that I read a lot, or mention that I blog, or say something about writing some web content, people seem impressed. Not, you know, because they've read my brilliant writing but because they note that I have three small kids. And no nanny, cleaning lady or daycare. (I realize that this is perfectly normal in most parts of the world. But not so much around here.) They wonder where I find the time.

I've recently made room in my world for exercise again. And I do read a lot. And blog (though not as much lately). And write. And sometimes I play with my children. And I feed them. And I make sure they don't kill each other. I realized, as I incorporated exercise into my life again, that it's possible to fit in the things I really want to do.

What I don't really do is clean. I mean, there are clean dishes (a trick since our current dishwasher seems to have died recently), clean clothes and clean sheets. There's usually not any mold growing in the toilet. I try to sweep after every meal, if only to prevent ChunkyMonkey eating food from the floor. But I'm not a cleaner. I have to be inspired to mop, or to dust or to clean under the couches.

I LIKE it when things are clean, but given a choice between reading and vacuuming, the book is going to win.

But I never know how to answer people when they seem to be impressed with what I can do in a day. Do I admit that my house is messy and cluttered? That my kids ask me what I'm doing every time I mop? That my kids watch too much TV? Or do I just give them a smug smile?

This Is What I Get For Trying To Do The Right Thing

Lovebug spent most of last night screaming. He would calm down when I went into his room, but he still wasn't happy. We asked him if anything hurt, if he wanted this or that and he always answered no. We'd cuddle him and then put him in the crib and leave the room. He would scream and instead of falling asleep as he usually does, he would grow louder and louder. So loud that I would go back in to check on him. Finally, I put him down and searched his crib to see if anything in it could be hurting him. He toddled over to his books and brought me one. Apparently my son woke up at midnight because I didn't read him enough stories before bed.

I remember when he didn't like stories at bed time. At six and seven months, he had no interest. Ironflower loved to be read to immediately, but I worried about Lovebug. I read to him despite his lack of interest - some nights he would only let me read while he breastfed. But about six months ago, he finally started to be interested in books. He began choosing what books we read and actually listening as I read them.

So naturally the one area where I felt like a good mom has backfired. Lovebug is now obsessed with bedtime books. At nearly twenty months he is already a bookworm. Last night I read him an extra story, then explained that it was WAY PAST bedtime and he had to go to sleep. He screamed for twenty minutes straight. But I held out because I knew all he wanted was another book. I peeked at him right after the screaming stopped. He was asleep.

I am dreading this evening.